Millar Love Continued

"Whether a player is better or worse is not the point. It was about (identity of) the 2004 Sox. You've got to roll with those guys at least through 2005. Where's the loyalty? Mark Bellhorn hits two of the biggest home runs in franchise history, but, sorry buddy, WEEI (850 AM sports talk radio) is wearing you about striking out, so you've got to go." -- Kevin Millar

Oh, Kevin---Have I told you lately that I love you?

-Shannon.

Hold The Phone

"The Orioles are seriously weighing a proposal from the Red Sox of Manny Ramirez and Matt Clement for Miguel Tejada" Wait wait wait...Hold the phone. All I heard was "blah blah blah this is the worst trade proposal EVER."

They say two heads are better than one. But come on!! How can two brains screw up this much?

My Proposal? Keep Manny. Keep Clement. Sign Pokey. THE END.

-Shannon

Reality Blows

I can't take it anymore. I hate wasting my winter away, staring at the glow of a computer screen, trying to scrap together information on trade rumors. Last night I sat longingly in front of my television as Hazel Mae presented "Red Sox Year In Review."

I hungry desire overcame me, even as that little white ball sailed next to Tony Graffanino's early rising glove, and into centerfield, where Johnny Damon's pitiful arm could never aide in an assist. I realized I wanted baseball back. But not just any baseball, the baseball I fell in love with, the utopian team where happiness trumps the payroll, and where a loose group of lovable players warms the heart of a nation.

And I think for the first time it hit me...Kevin Millar is not coming back.

This is probably the most devastating blow to the Red Sox team this offseason, and yet many would probably disagree with me.

In truth, Kevin Millar is not a fantastic baseball player. He is slow, can go into slumps (until mid july) and is as "okay" fielder. But he is one heck of a cheerleader. He makes the team loose, he keeps the fans at ease, and more importantly, he loves the game, which makes it enjoyable for everyone to watch.

So GodSpeed Kevin Millar, and may you find a home as a NESN announcer in the next 10 years.

-Shannon

'Twas The Night Before Christmas

'Twas the night before Christmas, that Tek ensured the troubled Red Sox Nation that he would be around for many more Octobers, by re-signing. Merry Christmas Jason Varitek. Merry Christmas Red Sox Nation.

The Dark Side-Burns

Earlier today, in a galaxy far, far away..... a giddy George Steinbrenner stroked his chin while he watched a clean shaven Johnny Damon address the media, and a blushing Brian Cashman hand the Ex-Nesn correspondant, Michelle, 18 Roses. "First of all, what do you guys think?" Damon said, looking at the cameras while stroking his chin. "Keep on snapping away." Spoken in a true HUMBLE fashion Mr. Damon Bra-vo.




In a surprise turn in events, Johnny decided to have his hair cropped in a mullet-esk style, with razor-sharp sideburns. Now, the hair didn't surprise me, but honestly, the sideburns are a little harsh.

Let us take a moment to compare various sideburns:

There is of course the familiar
Mark Bellhorn Sideburns:


The Classic Elvis Sideburns:


And The Johnny Depp Sideburns (From Hell):

Now It looks like Johnny Damon is going for the Johnny Depp look, ironically enough he chooses the hair/facial hair style from the movie "From Hell".

---------------


And though it may be hard to believe, Life does go on outside of the Johnny Damon Show in NY. Such as the fact that the Red Sox acquired Catcher John Flaherty who will either spend his time in Pawtucket or as a Knuckleball specialst. Though indications seem to point to Kelly Shoppach as a replacement to Mirabelli.

So let this be the last time we utter the name Johnny Damon on this blog, for with the hair goes his dignity, red soxness, and everything that made him endearing to our beloved Red Sox Nation.

"To fall in love is to create a religion that has a fallible god." Or "Jesus" in this case.

-Shannon

Johnny Who?

I am not someone who likes to be awoken out of a sound sleep, and I am especially not someone who likes to be awoken from a sound sleep to hear that the Red Sox player who got me interested in baseball in the first place, is now a Yankee.

I know others might be handling this situation better than me at the moment, and I must give them credit. But I simply cannot sit here at my computer and Thank Johnny for everything he has done as a Red Sox. Not now, who knows if ever. Yes, I am bitter.

I actually lost faith in Johnny when in whole Red Sox or Bust attitude from 2004 changed to an " I wouldn't mind cutting my hair for 'ol George" attitude.



So I think it's time I write Johnny a Dear John letter:

Dear John,

Thank you for making me love the Red Sox more so than I did before. But unlike you, I "kept the faith" and did not go over to the Dark side. So you can have your pinstripes, wrap them around your neck and Choke (like the Yankees always seem to do nowadays). Also, I hope you go bald, and can never pull it back into a pony tail again. I hope you find New York as cozy as Steinbrenner's ass, because that's where you're going to have to stay if you want to be the lead off hitter.

-Regrettably yours,
Shannon

Merry Effing Christmas To Me

One would think that Christmas came a day early to hear Pat admit his secret admiration of Mark Bellhorn, and though it did make me smile to see that we actually agree on how much Tony Graffanino sucks, to fact that he will even be returning makes me want to G-A-G! Now, coincidently in "Bellhorn Nation" Gag is an ackronym for Go Away Graffanino.



Now, The Top 5 Reasons Why I Hate Graffanino:
1.) He replaced Mark Bellhorn. Enough said right? well wrong. See, I would normally be open to the new player, (i.e. Todd Walker's replacements...both of them) but there was just something I didn't trust.

2.) His error in Game 2 of the ALDS. Even I could've made that play.

3.) The fact that everyone thinks he is the Lord Jesus Christ. Yes, Gary Disarcgina I'm talking to you.

4.) He reminds me of Hazel Mae. Too flashy for our poor little Red Sox.

5.) He was always missed games for the worst reasons. "My Pinky hurts skip, I think I need to ice it" <-- Would Johnny Damon say that? Would Trot say that? Would Curtis say that? Would even lowly Mark Bellhorn say that? I. Think. Not.


- - -

In other news, Mark Bellhorn still has not signed with a team. But his hair has started to grow back :) .


And to think, I was harassed by a fat man at the Sox/Yanks game for holding a sign that proclaimed "Bellhorn's Better" I guess I had the last laugh.

Shannon.

Side Effects Can Be Dangerous--Contact your Doctor.

Let me take a second to play "Pharmacist's Daughter" to prove your steroid accusations of Kevin Millar wrong.

Though it would be ignorant for me to suggest that Millar is a saint, and that no one on the Red Sox past or present has never tried/taken Anabolic Steroids, I find it improbable that our dearest Millar was an Addict.




Why? Why, the Side Effects my Dear Watson.

1.) Water Retention - Now I will be the first to admit he is not the smallest guy in the world, but his face does not look like an over-inflated balloon.

2.) Acne - Millars skin is as smooth as a baby, and the "new areas" that can start to have acne after usage would have been made apparent on The Queer Eye episode.

3.) Gynecomastia - The formation of breasts on a male. I don't really know what to say about this one haha. But I don't think Millar has breasts. I wonder what size cup Sheffield wears, hmmm.

4.) Aggression - "also know as “roid rages”. Surprisingly, several athletes feel this is a positive effect. They often find they lift more, and are more intense during workouts. On the negative side, users find themselves fighting with family, friends, and co-workers with an uptight behavior. " I don't think I have to say anything to defend Millar here. He has big arms from lifting, but so does every other baseball player. But I think the personality thing is enough to prove that Millar def. does not take steroids.

The rest of the side effects are ones that the gen. public would not know about, unless something happened to him, such as a heart attack, or liver disease.

But just let me make it clear that different effects of steroids are not noticable in all its users, but most, like aggression are.

The reason for his lack of success this season are probably due in part to the fact that he had to take care of twins. Have you ever tried taking care of a little child? Especially at night? The poor guy was probably agghuasted and overtired before he even got to the ballpark. Also, his "BELLY" may be due to the fact that he endorsed KFC. Think about it. Or maybe the fact that his partner in crime, the lovely Mark Bellhorn was DFA'd. Think about it. haha.




-Shannon
Edit: Nomar is off to the Dodgers, joining Grady Little, Dlowe, and Billy Mueller.

Rockets Red Glare

-Houston we have a problem-

I would rather see Pedro back in the starting rotation that Roger. The guy is a nutter, with roid rage. He would be a good influence, but that's why we have Curt Schilling, and as we saw in '04 two prima donas creates tension.

Now, analytically speaking, the Red Sox would be better to have a younger starting rotation. Ship David Wells away, his heart isn't in Boston and Dave Roberts would add depth the bench, (and love to our hearts) Curt Schilling--who knows if he will ever be the same? (Not that he didn't look good when I saw him pitch) Pappelbon -- I can't wait to watch the guy, Bronson -- will be a great pitcher in a few years, Clement-- see Schilling (but I'm not giving up on him yet)

Now Roger Clemmens, 1st of all the guy is getting older, the Sox need young talent!! And even if he is "good to go" what's to stop him from playing the "I'm Retiring---Just Kidding!!" game?

Orlando Cabrera, I never said we should trade for him, only that we should've never let him go.

But seriously, The Rocket? I think I'd rather have Kevin Millar on the hill. At least he wouldn't get so darn angry and dangerous.

Come on :
OR

You Decide..haha. :-P

-Shannon

Short Shopping?

Though I agree with Pat's logic, as a GM I would not sign Nomar for the following reasons:

1.) The guy is no stranger to the DL.
2.) He does not "Keep The Faith"
3.) He was the Best Red Sox ss in history, true, but was being the key word.

But we all know King George doesn't exactly think things through (i.e. Giambi).

Though I cannot blame Pat for not wanting to give up in Nomar, deep down he's still attached to the number 5.

Pokey Reese, love the guy. Honestly as much as I love Mark Bellhorn, I always liked Pokey and never wanted him to leave. (Great fielder, Great guy, but bad hitter--Neither George nor Larry would tolerate that)

But I stand by my first statement, O.C. for SS! <<But you know, good 'ol #12 would make a nice ss too. Just ask the Cubs :)

Shannon

Short-Stop Soap Opera

I really cannot decide which off-season is the most upsetting/dramatic yet.

2003/04- The finger pointing begins, Manny for A-rod deal, A-rod to NYY, Curt Schilling signs, Nomar pouting, Keith Foulke Signs.

2004/05- W.S. euphoria lasts until December when Pedro, Tek, O.C., and Dlowe drama begins. Pedro to Mets- less that 24 hours after reports confirmed his return to Boston (I still haven't forgiven Minaya on that one) Tek stays, Dlowe goes (we knew thee too well), and then Orlando Cabrera leaves.

And then compare those to this off-season, which has been mostly a downward spiral. With all the "he said/she said" drama, trades, trade requests, free agents, No Theo, and the fact that the Red Sox are missing a good portion of the infield does not sit well in my stomach, literally.

Another thing that I cannot understand is the Shortstop soap opera that is unveiling. So let me just lay this out...

1.) Red Sox trade away #1 prospect SS Hanley Ramirez, But only a few weeks later trade away their "long time" shortstop Edgar Renteria who was just warming up to Boston.

2.) Edgar blames the Fenway infield for his errors and bad playing. (I blame Tony Buckner Graffanino) So What will the Red Sox do now? Tejada anyone? (but only if Manny can stay too!!)

And then there's Nomar: The star of this SS soap opera.
Why the Yanks would want him---I just don't get it. Hello people the man SEPARATED HIS GROIN FROM HIS BONE/LEG. I mean its good for the Red Sox if the Yanks pick up this liability but honestly, you have to question their logic on this one. Honestly, Nomar at first base?? How many Shortstops does it take to play infield George?? 3? You know--there are players that specialize at certain bases. I guess we will never understand your crazy reasoning.

The only thing that should be taken away from this ShortStop Drama is that the Front Office should have NEVER have let Orlando Cabrera get away.

And so it begins..

The Red Sox are more than a team. They are a way of life, they are a solace, they are an obsession. Which makes it fitting that Pat and I have create a haven for where we can rant, gush, and argue baseball. And when better to start than the offseason?

Pat and I will try to post at least once a day, but remember we are only human.

So let me introduce myself.

"Hi." *waves* "I'm Shannon"